Mentoring FAQ
Tl;dr: When in doubt, listen actively and ask probing questions.
Q: How do I figure out my mentee’s career goals?
In order to be a good coach or mentor you don’t actually need to know about the mentee’s career goals. Look at what
challenges may be similar to challenges you have faced. Actively listen to your mentee about concerns and ask probing questions.
It is not your job to come up with answers, the mentee likely knows the answer and can get to it with guidance.
Q: What do I do if I’m not connecting with my mentee?
As much as the Mentorship Program tries to perfectly pair mentees/mentors, you can’t expect to walk in the door and have a deep connection. Relationships take time to grow and trust takes time to build. Here are some tips to build your relationship and make each meeting meaningful:
- Get to know each other: Build a rapport with one another by discussing personal interests such as how do they spend their free time, what books are they currently reading or what is the mentor working on in their own career. You will probably have more in common than you realize, which will make it easier to relate when discussing career goals.
- Talk about mentoring: Every mentor/mentee relationship is different, so understand what each other want out of your meetings. Have either one of you participated in a mentorship program or had a mentorship relationship? What did you learn from it? What part of the approach did you like and what would you change?
- Meet consistently and be reliable: It is important to honor your commitment to your mentor/mentee, so this means that you should be on-time for your monthly meetings, be fully present in your discussions and come prepared.
- Communicate frequently and take action with clear expectations: As a mentee, you should take the mentor’s suggestions to heart and communicate your progress in between meetings. Both sides should make it clear that they are following through on their discussions so that you both feel that you are investing time wisely. In conjunction with this, you should discuss expectations. What does success look like and what is the timetable for achieving it?
- Be open and honest: Be straightforward with each other and welcome transparency. Mentors should not sugarcoat things and a mentee should be open to all types of feedback. You should communicate your assumptions, needs, limitations and expectations.
If you do still do not feel comfortable discussing some issues with your mentee or mentor, focus on what you can learn from that person and look for other informal mentors for other needs.
Q: What if my mentee hasn’t scheduled meetings?
Reach out to your mentee and let him or her know that you are looking forward to meeting with them. He or she may feel ill prepared; encourage him or her to meet anyway. The first meeting should focus on getting to know each other and becoming more comfortable. From there, it will make it easier to discuss your goals and priorities.
Q: What do I do if my mentee doesn’t like structure?
Good mentor relationships require planning and structure. Research shows that these tools are effective and have a high rate of success. Encourage your mentee to give it a try and add it as a potential goal.
If your mentee says they don’t like structure, ask why that is the case and listen to their reasoning. It is possible that they are
overwhelmed with work and structure is actually what they need. They may not have clear expectations for what the mentorship program is.
If this is the case, press the reset button and start discussing expectations and goals for the program itself. Such as: How often to meet
and for how long? What type of relationship do they want from a mentor? What are their goals for the program?
Q: I have a busy schedule and have to cancel our meetings. Should I not be a mentor?
As a New York Times employee, of course you are busy! View this mentorship program as not only a commitment to your mentee/mentor but
also to yourself. Both sides benefit from this relationship whether it be setting career goals or working on management skills.
Schedule your sessions far in advance and make them a priority. If you do have to cancel, be sure to get another time on the calendar
immediately. A good mentorship requires reliability and frequent communication.
Q: I don’t know how to start helping my mentee
Sometimes you just need to start somewhere! Some ideas are:
- Recommend a blogpost, video or book you’ve read that you can chat about.
- Introduce your mentee to someone they don’t know at the company.
- Share a story about a challenging point in your own career to create a safe space for sharing.
- Create a Google Doc for goals and use it as a working document to provide comments and feedback.
- Be conscious of your mentee saying “I should”, “I’ll try”, instead suggest “I will”, “I am”.
- Encourage growth-mindset vs fixed mindset (setbacks = growth).
Probing questions
Now
- What do you enjoy working on now?
- What are your greatest strengths?
- What challenges you?
- What are your biggest areas for development?
- What do you want to do more of? Less of?
- In what areas are you getting feedback around work well done?
- In what areas do you want to develop in your current role?
- What accomplishment are you proud of?
- How would you describe your work style?
- How do you react to developmental feedback?
- What do people seek your help on?
Next
- What aspects of the broader business at the Times interest you?
- Are there untapped opportunities in the organization that interest you?
- How are our customers changing? How can you fill those changing needs?
- What are our most significant challenges? How can you help solve them?
- In what ways can you develop your skills to meet those challenges?
- What specific skills do you want to learn?
- How are your skills being underused? How can you apply these skills and interests in other projects or in other areas of the organization?
- What is next for you?
Future
- How could your skills and experiences support the Path Forward?
- What is your 6 month, 1 year, 3 year and 5 year career goals?
- Are there untapped opportunities in your industry that interest you?
- What are you willing to invest to make a career change happen?
- What experiences do you want to gain:
- Within your current position?
- Within the team?
- Outside of work?
(From www.getlighthouse.com)
More Resources
Growth-Mindset:
